Husbands Love Your Wife...

Today, I just needed to speak whats on my mind. Here we are, in the middle of a world wide epidemic, forced to be closed in our homes. Going on week... I don't even know how long it has been now. But the truth is, close quarters has exacerbated what was already percolating inside of me. Right now, I am struggling emotionally. Right now, my marriage feels hard. Right now, life feels really difficult. Right now, all I can think about is where are the teachings in the church that shows how a good marriage works.

Truth bomb... christian woman I talk to have the same issues in marriage. We all seem to struggle wondering how to fix what feels wrong. We all want our husbands to step up to the challenges of making our reality better. We all want our husbands to lead us, help us, take care of us. We want desperately to be loved by our man the way Jesus loves us. I don't need to teach women how to love sacrificially, motherhood teaches us that. I don't need to teach how to submit, we've all had that drilled into us. 

According to scripture, what I have been taught over and over about the roles in a marriage. The part played by both parties is the same.
Wives, submit yourself to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. (Ephesians 5:22-28) 

Here are my very honest thoughts:

As someone who was single for a very long time; before deciding to remarry, submission was a difficult concept for me to embrace. I'm not going to lie, it's been a journey learning to submit to the leadership of someone else. I might not come by it easily, but I do desire to do it humbly and honestly.

From the beginning of time, woman has been inclined to take the lead and man has often gladly given it away. Because I know this, God continually exhorts me to voluntarily submit wholeheartedly to my husbands leadership. There are times I have to remind myself, this means even when my husband doesn't deserve it. But by divine right, God has set him as the leader of our family and I know I can trust the goodness of God. As I submit when its difficult, I am reminded that nothing escapes God and I'm not accountable whether my husband is doing what right before God.

Through the years I have work hard to do what God calls me to do. To stand down at times where I would rather pick up the reins and run to fix what challenges come our way. To encourage my husband and challenge him to step forward and make decisions. To charge the gates of heaven with prayer for his health, healing, holiness and transformation to be more like Christ. To be his helpmate and support the desires of his heart.

There is no shortage of teaching concerning marriage as the topic that detail what it means for a woman to submit to her husband. It seems to be spelled out for us in detail what it might look like for us to submit to one another. I have had the picture painted very clearly for me what my role should be and how it should look. But for men, they are told to love their wives as Jesus loves the church. And to this day, I have never heard it taught what that looks like in practical details.

So I am going to try very hard to spell it out as I see it. From both a biblical standing and the viewpoint of a woman and wife.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. This is where it normal starts and ends with teaching. Love her like Jesus loves the church. Jesus sacrificed himself for the church.

Husbands love your wife with a sacrificial love. Every husband is willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for his wife. If someone was holding a gun to you both saying one of you is going to die: most husbands would sacrifice themselves. Most husbands would tell the person holding the gun to kill them and let his wife go. Most men would do the noble thing and die for her. But here's the question, will you live for her? Sacrifice is not a one time act, its a day-by-day dying to your selfishness and ego for her sake.

Are you willing to make the sacrifice day-by-day? Will you hold loosely to your time and make sure you are investing it in her? Will you put boundaries around your work, personal interest and responsibilities so you make sure she comes in first place? What about your preferences so you can concede to hers? Will you sacrifice your preferences with a joyful heart with no feeling of injustice or selfishness?  Will you let go of some of your dreams so she can achieve hers? Will you ferociously eradicate the sin in yourself so you can be the best version of you for her? Will you live more for her good than for your own? Will you consider all the sacrifice as an honor instead of feeling burdened by it?

We could stop there and if done successfully, every woman would be in awe and feel deeply loved but lets keep going because the verse doesn't stop there. Paul says the reason Jesus sacrificed himself for his bride the church is for her sanctification. He gave himself up to make her holy. Jesus calls husbands to love their wives with a sanctifying love. He died so the church would be set apart for the service of God. Husbands will you sacrifice yourself day-to-day in order to set apart your wife for service to God?

Your wife exists to bring Glory to God, together with you, but first individually. She was set apart to God. Yes, to be your helper but first to be God's servant. And she was only given to you so you could help her be even-better at being set apart to God.

She exists first to bring glory to God. This means your task as a husband is to be committed to helping her unleash her gifts, talents, passions and interest to bring the greatest glory to God. Not with reservation that it might hinder you glorifying God or hinder your agenda. But with complete abandon knowing what she feels called to might deduct from you and your interest. Will you sacrifice yourself in order to make sure she becomes all God has called her to be and to do?

Paul goes on saying this,cleansing her by washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
Husbands, do you love with a purifying love? If a wife is to submit, then a husband is to lead. A wife can not follow aimless wandering. The call for a husband is leading, guiding and assisting your wife to greater holiness. Jesus cleanses his bride by washing her with water through the word. The call to a husband is to grow in holiness himself and lead the way by the word of God. This means not just understanding or knowing the word but being changed by, on fire by it, with it burning sanctification in you soul. It is not enough to just read your Bible everyday, say a prayer and hope for the best. You must ask God to take the pride from your heart and bring true humility to you. How can you possibly lead where you have never been or refuse to go? You must first identify your own sin and ruthlessly put it to death. The task of growing in greater holiness, love and character falls to you as the leader. A husband is to drench himself in the word and then lead his family in the gospel. You are the bible leader, prayer leader, and the worship leader. Are you washing your wife with the water through the word as Jesus does the church? If you do nothing else, step up to leadership and read the Bible and pray with your wife.

All leaders are set to, and accountable for, a higher standard before God.  Most importantly is the leadership position of husband. One day everyone of us will stand before God and account for our lives. A husband will account for not just himself but the family that he was put in leadership of. God will ask him what he did with the woman he was gifted with. Did he lead her to greater glory for God or leave her unguided. Did he guide her towards holiness or damage her heart? Did he languish in his own sin leaving her with no direction? Did he hold her up to be all God called her to be or did he allow his own ego and selfish ambition to ruin her soul with hurt and anger. 

It's time for the church to step into the positions they have been given of glorifying God and stop the advancement of the enemy in marriage. Will you do your part.

He said "Believe Me"

    I haven't written a blog post in over two years.  I began the process of writing a book and dropped blogging to put my focus on the book.  It has taken me this long and I'm still not finished.  Two long years I have been working on it.  It has been a hard process.  Because I wanted to focus on finishing the book I have neglected the outlet this blog gave me.  So all those times I had something brewing in my heart or something that just wouldn't leave my mind I neglected to share those things.  Much more, I suppressed the release that the process of writing gives to me.  It releases something inside me and helps me let go of things.  It helps me to trust God with what my heart and mind is struggling to understand.  In writing I seek God for the answers so I can put them down on paper.  That has always been my process.  I ask God to give me words and I believe He does.  Today I realized that sometimes its OK to put down the grind of performance and just write to share whats on my mind.  Its OK to just write whats on my heart instead of sitting at the keyboard trying to find the next words to say in my book.  I will finish the book, its close to being done.  But today I have something else to share and maybe someone else out there in internet land needs to hear it.  

     Sunday morning before last I got up like every other Sunday morning.  I hopped in the shower, washed my hair and set about getting ready for church.  As I stood at the mirror drying my hair I heard God say something to me that has stuck with me for almost two weeks now.  He said "Believe Me."  That's it.  

    Now mind you I am not crazy.  I don't walk around hearing audible voices from out nowhere.  What I mean when I say God spoke to me is He whispered a thought into my mind.  I knew it was Him because why in the world would I say "Believe Me" to myself.   It just wasn't the kind of thought I would think on my own.  And it left this impression on my mind that has stuck like glue and made me ponder on what He was trying get across.  

    I have been mulling it over and chewing on the idea for almost two weeks now.  I have prayed about it and asked God to clarify it in my mind.  I believe I have come to understand what He meant.

    For a very long time, well, most of my life I have doubted myself.  I have lived my life wondering if I was good enough.  It has always been my inner dialogue to believe that I am less than others and somehow not good enough to achieve anything substantial or succeed in any way.   It has been my standard operating procedure to doubt my own ability, my likability, my talents and my intelligence.  I have doubted my worthiness in every way possible. I have spent my time thinking why would anyone ever listen to me or believe I have anything worthwhile to say.  

    Since I started writing, God has been telling me things about myself.  He has poured into me trying to get me to believe in myself.  He has been pouring into me trying to show me that I have things He has given me that are of importance.  That inside of me is untapped potential that He has been waiting to unleash.  He has told me all these things about myself.  That I am important, worthy and the daughter of a King.  That I have gifts that He has specifically placed within me.  Gifts that if I trust Him with will touch others in the world.  Gifts of words and experiences that can help others.  

    Up till now, I have doubted.  Like maybe He didn't really know the real me.  Or He didn't really see me clearly.  I don't think I really knew that the doubt was doubt.  I just felt insecure and questioned whether I was who He kept saying I was.  It was like I just couldn't let go and believe that those things about myself were true. 

    Then He said "Believe Me."  and I have been thinking about it for days now.  That maybe I really am who He says I am.  I really do have the things inside of me that He believes I have.  So today I am making a choice to believe Him.  To believe I am the writer He says I am.  To believe I have the abilities He says I have.  To believe I have the importance He puts on me.  

    I am going to believe Him and be who He says that I am.  I am worthy.  I am gifted. And I have the ability to be who He has called me to be.  Maybe you need to believe Him too.  Believe Him and step into the confidence of who He says you are.                         

Ministry Isn't What I Thought It Would Be

I haven't put my fingers to the keyboard on this site for what seems like forever.  I haven't wanted to let the feelings out that lurk below the surface of my "got it all together now" facade.  When I began this blog everything was so easy...the words came out so freely...it was so easy to lay it all out there, to be honest. Guess I felt I had nothing really to lose.  But life got bigger on me....and it's become more complicated.  My dream of just getting up everyday to "do the Father's will like Jesus did" sprouted a heart that said "send me, Lord."  So I went...and a desire to follow became a ministry to help others.  With my lack of anything but a willingness I offered myself as a willing vessel.  Faith that God could use a person with little skills, I set out to follow a path that I believed would be filled with wonder and awe of the miraculous works of ministry.

Before my journey began I heard so many preachers speak about.... "God can use anyone to do great things"  "He's not looking for the most qualified...but the most willing" and I believed in what was spoken.  My problem now isn't that I no longer believe these comments to be true.  I believe God can use anyone.  I believe that God is looking for those of us who are willing.  My problem now is that most of the people that preached these thing to me really didn't believe it themselves.    What I have encounter isn't a community that believe God to be powerful enough to transform someone and use them in ways never dreamed of.  No instead I have encountered many that doubt my ability to be of great use....because I lack the seminary degree to be able to write about the word of God and teach.  Because I am a woman....I lack what is needed to teach a man.  Instead of support from the Pastors and Leaders in my community in starting a ministry, instead of helping us get our legs underneath us, we have been ignored....thought of as a competitor....and plainly dismissed.

I am disillusioned.  To see the possessiveness of pastors....to see the lack of community between those who feel called to the gospel of reconciliation...to see the lack of enthusiasm and support for those who have enough courage step out in faith.  To those of us who put it all on the line for our Lord....who put all our money into saving the lost...who put our comfort and future security in the hands of God in order to step out and be the hands and feet of Christ...who sacrifice time to be there for others who are living in a messed up world....who do things that most perceive as crazy or not following protocol for the glory of God....we need to know what we are doing is encouraged and supported.

I love Jesus....but does anyone else?  That has been my question lately.  Or do they love having big buildings and big congregations?  Or do they love feeling important because they went to seminary?  Or do they love the rules they have decided we follow in order to be greatly used by God?  What do they really love?

What I am saying is .... Jesus didn't require much to be used but I'm finding others do.  And it leaves me feeling like I'm walking alone.

Time for Joy - Part 6

I don't know about you but since I have started this study I have been trying to start my day with the choice to have joy.  As I get out of bed, I remind myself "choose joy."

The other day as I got out of bed, my mind set on a day filled with joyous thinking....I made it only fifteen minutes before someone stole it from me.   Someone that will remain nameless (I'm married to him), started in on a conversation that I really wasn't prepared to have so early in the morning.  I am not a morning person....give me at least an hour before you bounce around and shoot questions at me please. 

As this person spoke, I recognized my mood changing and my joy slipping away.  My brow began to furrow and my eyes became small slits with laser focus.  All the time my brain was saying "wwwwhhhhaaatttt?"  

Point is, in just a few moments my mind had changed from uplifted pleasant thoughts to frustration and irritation.  My joy that I had started with was stolen within one short conversation.  We can start out with such great intention and enthusiasm but be derailed in an instant. 

Life is full of these type of joy stealing moments.  If we could just get rid of the people and circumstances that steal joy our life would be so great, right!?!  I can imagine it now..... Sitting alone in my office, no people, no work, nothing to do that would steal my joy.  Doing nothing, going nowhere, speaking to no one.  Alone.  All the time.   

Maybe it would seem good for a little while but after about an hour of NOTHING I would go completely crazy.  Although people can rub you the wrong way, what would life be like without contact, conversations and love?   And wouldn't it get really boring without different circumstances in life?

There are so many people and circumstances that attempt to steal our joy that we have to determine ahead of time to have joy.  We have to determine not to let those things steal the joy we have chosen.  We have to decide.... NO ONE IS GOING TO STEAL MY JOY TODAY!  Then when that moment comes where you feel your joy slipping away you can say to yourself...."no, no, no, you aren't going to steal my joy! Not today.  Today, I will have joy!"

This my friend is doing what the scripture says in 2 Corinthians 10:5 and taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.  When we stop our thinking process mid thought and say "No, I'm going there!", we are taking our thoughts captive and determining how we will proceed within that moment.  Our feelings and thoughts are not to control us....we should control them!

So today.... no....every day....choose joy and determine not to let it be stolen by the people or circumstances around you.  

Time for Joy - Part 5

Joy is a choice.... So are you choosing joy in your circumstances?  Are you shifting the way you think?
I hope so but I have to admit that there are some circumstances that can make it extremely difficult to choose joy.

Like a parent of a small child that has a chronic illness.  That's makes it hard to choose joy.  Or when you yourself have suffered most of your life at the hands of another.  What about when you are going along nicely and are stricken with a chronic illness.  Maybe your spouse or child gets in a car accident and now needs constant care from you.  What about watching your aging parent lose their ability to care for themselves.  Maybe it's your marriage that is difficult and leaves you with deep depression. 

Is it possible to still find joy in the midst of the difficult?  Can we find a place of joy even when suffering is consuming our life?   It's a tall order to seek joy when you are suffering.  Most of us would rather curl up in a ball somewhere and stay miserable.    But then there are some that learn to overcome and live in a place of contentment and joy in spite of the suffering.  If you will allow me.... today I would like to share with you some of the secrets they have found.

First I would like to tell you about a fellow blogger named Lori Laws.  Lori has Muscular Dystrophy and has written a book titled "A Blessing in the Storm....Muscular Dystrophy messed up my life and made me whole."   In her memoir she shares her story of how her life was great.  Life was going along fine when along came Muscular Dystrophy and messed up her whole world.  But in her suffering circumstances she found what really lacked in her life.  She found Jesus Christ and he made her whole on the inside.  She still struggles with her illness everyday but she uses her circumstance to encourage others.  She carries in her a great contentment and joy that comes only from Christ.  In the storm of her suffering she has found great blessing.  She finds her blessing by keeping her eyes on the one who can give joy even when life gets hard.

This scripture fits her circumstance.

Colossians 1: 10-11 - That you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and long suffering with joy.

The writer of Colossians is trying to tell us....To have patience, suffer long and still have joy, you need to do these things......   

1.  Walk worthy of the Lord.... Be pleasing to Him - How do we walk worthy of the Lord?  We obey Him.  If we love Him, we will obey His commands. 

2.  Be fruitful in every good work. -  Do good with what you have been given.  Even in your suffering you can find good to do. 

3.  Increase in the knowledge of God. - The Word of God is living and healing for the soul.  God tells us to increase in knowledge of God because that is what will continue our relationship with Him to grow.  His joy is often found in the Word.  In Jeremiah 15:16 he said Your words were found, and I ate them, and Your word was to me the joy and rejoicing of my heart; for I am called by Your name, O Lord, God of hosts.

4. Be strengthened by His might and glorious power.  - Lean in!  Supernatural power comes only from a supernatural source.  God is the only supernatural source that can supply joy in the midst of suffering.  Nehemiah  8:10b says "Do not sorrow, for the joy of the Lord is your strength."  Let Him be your joy and your strength.

One last story for you before I go...  

In the book "The Life You've Always Wanted" by John Ortberg, he shares a story about a woman named Mabel.  A pastor friend of his visited a state-run convalescent hospital and met Mabel.  When he met her she was strapped in a wheel chair sitting at the end of a long hallway.  The sight of her was absolute horror.  Such so that new nurses were sent to feed her as their first duty to test them.  If they could stand the sight of her, they could stand most anything. 

Mabel sat in her wheelchair with an empty stare because she was blind.  In her ear was a large hearing aid because she was nearly deaf.  One side of her face was eaten by cancer and there were discolored and running sores covering part of one check.  The cancer had pushed her nose to one side, dropped one eye and distorted her jaw so that what should have been the corner of her mouth was the bottom of her mouth She drooled constantly.  And now at the age of eighty-nine years old, she had been here, bedridden, blind, nearly deaf, and alone for twenty-five years. 

The pastor goes on to tell about his encounter that day with Mabel.  He ends up continuing to visit her each week.  First the visits were for her...but eventually the visits became for Himself.  You see, Mabel had something that most of us don't have, she had joy and contentment even in her suffering. 

The young pastor began asking himself, " What does Mabel have to think about - hour after hour, day after day, week after week, not even able to know if it's day or night?"   The next visit he asks her "Mabel what do you think about when you lie here?" 

This was her reply..... "I think about Jesus.  I think about how good He's been to me.  He's been awfully good to me in my life, you know....I'm one of those kind who's mostly satisfied... Lot's of folks wouldn't care much for what I think.  Lot's of folks would think I'm kinda of old-fashioned.  But I don't care.  I'd rather have Jesus.  He's all the world to me." 

You see.... Mabel had the joy of the Lord.... She had all she needed.  And you can too.

MORE ON JOY NEXT TIME......  BUT UNTIL THEN, FIND SOME JOY, CHOOSE TO HAVE JOY AND THEN CONTINUE IN IT. 

Time for Joy - Part 4

Here's a little diddy for you....

                  I've got joy, joy, joy, joy,

                  down in my heart,

                  down in my heart,

                  down in my heart,

                  I've got joy, joy, joy, joy,

                  down in my heart,

                  down in my heart to stay.

If you have spent any time in church you will probably recognize this catchy tune from children's church.  Right about now you probably have the tune running through your mind.  It's one of those kind of songs that get stuck in your head and play all day long.  So as your day progresses today, its likely that you will have this tune on continual replay.  In response, you have a one of two choices....

1. You can get aggravated with me because I stuck a tune in your head and now you can't get it out. 

Or

2.  You can make the choice to use it to remind yourself to live in joy.

So here's my point,  we have choice.  What we feel does not have to dictate where we allow ourselves to go emotionally.  In any given situation we get to choose how we respond.

I spent allot of time early on in life looking for when I would be happy.  I remember thinking, "When I get a better job....then I'll be happy,  When I get my son potty trained.... then I'll be happy, When I find a good relationship....then I'll be happy."  I could go on and on with examples.  I did that continually.  When this happens...then I'll be happy.  I was wishing my life away.  Living in what might be in the future instead of having joy in my present.   I was stuck in the belief that my circumstances would change my happiness.  I got so tired of never finding the happiness when circumstances changed. 

One day I spied a book titled "I Choose Joy!"  It really resonated with me and I decided that I wanted to do that.  So I prayed and asked God to help me choose joy everyday and in all circumstances.  I had no idea what a dramatic change it would make in my life. 

Psalm 30:5 - Then I will go to the altar of God, to God my exceeding joy; and on the harp I will praise You, O God, my God.

Here is the thing.... just as this scripture says... God is my exceeding joy.  No matter what irritation I have in front of me or suffering I must endure, I can turn my face to the one that enjoys pouring out himself.  I can look to the one who is called joy and ask Him to pour a little out on me.  I can decide to let things go when I'm angered and choose joy.  It's a choice I make with every situation that presents itself.

You have a choice today.... I hope you choose joy!

SEE YOU NEXT TIME WITH MORE JOY.....

Time For Joy - Part 3

I don't know about you but I love a great fairytale!  I love the ones where the princes comes riding in on his horse and sweeps away all the bad stuff.   I guess I love those fairy tales the most because it reminds me of my prince who came galloping into my life and swept away all the bad stuff.  Then I think of Him riding in one great day on His white stallion to take me to my eternal home..... I look for Jesus and His return for me with great joy.

Back to fairy tales....

Once upon a time.   A great start for a fairytale, right? 

It's where the author usually begins a story and then spins a tale of horrible circumstances.  Those horrible circumstances then provide opportunity for a hero to eventually emerge and save the day.

Interesting that most fairy tales start with people under duress, with obstacles that seem overwhelming.  I guess there must be something horrible to overcome for there to be a need for a hero.

So I thought today I would start with a tale... not a fairytale but a real tale. 

Once upon a time there was an angel.  He was the most gloriously beautiful angel ever created.  One day he decided he was way to beautiful to take orders from anyone.  He set upon himself that instead of serving God, he would be not an angel but be himself a God.  Because of his pride and conceit he decided that he would not serve but be served.  Angered by his pride, God stripped him from his position and cast him out of heaven.  He would now be stuck and roam the earth until the time of his destruction would be fulfilled.  This once beautiful angel took on a hideous form.  His heart boiled with anger, bitterness and wrath for the God that had cast him out of heaven and cursed his beauty.  Because of his bitterness, he swore vengeance on anyone and anything that bore the mark of God.  The earth and all its creations bore the mark of its creator, so he caused destruction by making man fall into sin. 

Enters us, human beings created in the image of God.  The bane of this hideous creatures existence.  We make his blood boil with venom.  So he picks at us, pokes us, pushes us and sometimes flat out harms us.  He harmed the earth with the fall of man causing it to be in the process of decay.  Because of that process of decay we see natural disasters that fall on the head of man and bring him great suffering. Because every part of life is now in the process of destruction, even our bodies fail us.  Our outer bodies are on the path to death and they are riddled with things that cause us hardship and suffering.   Because of this tale of destruction of an angel, we people on this earth deal with great spiritual warfare and wrath.  So because of this real tale, joy in our circumstances is fleeting.  It comes and goes with the ebbs and tides of a dying world around us.  This is why we can not count on our joy being only in our circumstances.

Psalm 16:11 says this...You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your righthand are pleasures forevermore.

Here on earth our joys are transient and only momentary.  This is fitting for an earth such as ours that is in the process of decay.  Its the nature of things to come and go.  It's not the nature of circumstances while here on earth to be long lasting.  Our troubles come and go.... they stay for a while and then the tide changes.  With a new tide comes a new circumstance. 

Our true fullness of joy can only be manifested in the presence of God.  When we join Him at His righthand, meaning heaven, we will enjoy the lasting pleasures of joyful circumstances forevermore.  It is then that our circumstances will not change our joy. 

So for now.... while on this earth, we must understand that joy can be fleeting if we look for it only in the circumstances of life.   We must place out joy on something that cannot change.

MORE ON THAT TOMORROW... THE JOY THAT DOESN'T CHANGE.

Time for Joy - Part 2

I'd like to continue to expand on what I talked about yesterday.  Deuteronomy talked about serving with a heart of joy and gladness.  Not just in some things we do but for the abundance of everything. That's what it said...for the abundance of everything.  We are to live in the place of a joyful heart in everything, doing all that is required of us.

Our abundance should be what pushes us toward obeying God.   Maybe your saying..."I don't have abundance! I barely survive."  I get your perspective.  I really do.  Sometimes I feel like I will never get "ahead" in life.  I feel like I am getting further behind instead of moving forward.   

Do you ever feel that way?  It can drive you to feeling hopeless.  In that moment joy gets sucked right out the window.  Bye Bye joy....

But what if we started to look at our life with new eyes?  What if we gained a new perspective on abundance?  And what if your supposed to be right where you are right now?  What if this place in your life creates things in you that you would never learn without what your going through? 

If you live here in America, if you own a house, car, or even a book, you are considered rich to 95% of the world.  Your ability to live in a permanent dwelling, wear shoes, and get a public education is a blessing that many don't have.  If your dry, sleep in a warm bed and have more than one outfit to wear you are ahead of more people than you can count. 

So you have to turn your minds to what abundance you truly have and live with a new perspective so you can begin to live in gratefulness.  Today, take some time to count your blessings not what you are lacking.

Here's another scripture for you from the Old Testament....

I Chronicles 15:25- So David, the elders of Israel, and the captains over thousands went to bring up the ark of the covenant of the Lord from the house of Obed-Edom with joy.

In the next verses, 26-28,  we see David and his crew dancing and singing.  The return of the ark was met with great rejoicing!  It was a party!  It says David himself was whirling and playing music.  Picture it...the king is whirling round and round caught up in the moment.  So crazy of a scene that his wife was upset with him for making a spectacle of himself.  It says she despised him in her heart.  "A king should act kingly..... Stop acting like a fool!" was her feeling.

Why all the whirling and rejoicing over an ark?  We can look at this scene and ask that very question. Why would someone get so excited over a religious relic used in their old rituals?  It's because the ark of the covenant was the place where they met with God.  The ark was stolen during a previous battle and with the return of it, they could once again be in relationship with God.  They could return it to the temple where it belonged and resume their long standing relationship with the living God. 

The ark represented their relationship with God.  Just as they were filled with joy to be back in close relationship with God, we should be filled with great joy to have the opportunity to be close to God. 

I know that instead of seeing the opportunity for being in relationship with God as a joy filled experience, many see it as being restrictive.  Some might think.... "If I serve God I won't have fun anymore."

I get that.... I love to have fun!  But I haven't given up anything that I wanted to hold onto.  What I have found is that God's way is more than fun... it's deep in your heart, overwhelming peace and joy.  I haven't given up the fun in life, I've gained it, plus some. 

Finding joy takes a shift in your perspective... it takes a change in your thinking... and it takes accepting that God knows a better way.   If you want my suggestion.... you should start shifting so you can get yourself some joy!

MORE TOMORROW....

Time for Joy - Part 1

Recently I have been thinking allot about joy.  Seems to me that the understanding of joy has escaped us.  The world around us has so many things that weigh us down that we have forgotten what it means to be joyful.

I think it's not just time to find a little bit of joy....... NO, it's time that we found a whole lotta joy!  A whole lotta joy that we can hold onto for a whole lotta time.  The kind of joy that stays even when circumstances are hard.  The kind of joy that puts a heart at peace even when the ground is shaking and the walls are falling in.

There is that kind of joy out there and I plan to find it! I plan to not just find it but to begin to live in it! So join me if you need a whole lotta joy too.

I thought....where do I begin.  And my spirit inside cried out "scripture" "Look in the scripture!" 

YES! YES! Look in scripture.  I've learned if you want freedom....you go to the Word.  Seems the same should apply.  If it's joy that I want....I should look to the Word. 

So to the book of wisdom we will go.  It's full of life changing information. Alive and always speaking truth.


But first I thought I would look up the meaning of joy. It would be good to know what good old Webster's says about the topic.   
JOY - to rejoice, 1)a very glad feeling; happiness; great pleasure; delight; 2)anything causing such feeling 3)the expression or showing of such feelings - to be full of joy; rejoice. SYN - Pleasure.  

Curious that Webster's Dictionary would think of joy as mostly a feeling when I have always been taught that happiness and joy are separate and different from one another.    Okay, so it can be a emotional feeling.  What else can we find out?  

Time to whisk you off into a time long ago....not sure exactly how many years ago, but to the Old Testament.  What did God show those people so long ago about joy?   

Deuteronomy 28:47-48  Because you did not serve the Lord your God with joy and gladness of heart, for the abundance of everything.......  

Ewww....this looks bad..... Moses is telling the Israelites they will receive blessing if they are obedient to the laws of God and curses will come if they are disobedient.  If they don't serve God with JOY in their heart......  what?...what?  

therefore you will serve your enemies, whom the Lord will send against you, in hunger, in thirst, in nakedness, and in need of everything; and He will put a yoke of iron on your neck until He has destroyed you.  
WHOA! Because they didn't choose to joyfully serve, having a heart that was glad to be doing it, they would find themselves enslaved by their enemies with a yoke of iron.  They would be serving their enemies in greater hardship than they could ever have with God.  

The prediction came true....Rome under Titus, which was known as the iron kingdom, did enslave them and was a brutal master.  Their disobedience and ungratefulness of heart caused there own freedom to be taken.  

Matthew Henry's Commentary says this...  

The more God gives us the more cheerfully we should serve Him, our abundance should be oil to the wheels of our obedience.  God is a Master that will be served with gladness, and delights to hear us sing at our work.   

In other words...when we complain without real cause, we deserve to have a cause to complain about.  

As my mother said.... "Stop complaining or I'll really give you something to cry about!"  

What this led me to think on today was GRATEFULNESS.   I believe it may be a key point to having a joyful heart.  When we are grateful we have nowhere else to go but feeling joyful.   

JOIN ME BACK HERE TOMORROW FOR MORE ON JOY........        

We Shall Be Saved By His Life

Reading in Romans this morning I came across a scripture that made me go "hmmm", so of course I had to do a little investigation.  Don't you just love that the Word of God is always revealing new things.  I do.

Okay I digress...  Anyway, this is the scripture.

Romans 5:10 - "For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life."

We talk so much about being reconciled to God because of the death of Jesus and the penalty of death being removed and very little about what comes after.  But the end of this verse just made me look harder at what the author was trying to say.  

"Much more having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life."  Saved by His life.... and I always coined that term "saved" as being because of His death not His life. 

So into investigation mode I went... and found that the author is talking about the resurrected Christ who is now sitting up in heaven with the Father. 

In other words, if we thought it was great that we were reconciled because of His death, how much more intoxicating it should be because He lives in heaven mediating for us now.  We are continued in our salvation, every day working it out day by day, because He overcame death and now sits in heaven cheering for us.  We can rest assured that He is involved in our life day by day, minute by minute. 

I picture Jesus now finished with the hard stuff of death and now focused on US.  Focused on our daily walk of salvation and what we need to overcome.  His power is at our disposal and He is in constant watch over us.   We are His bride that He is in great want of.  His attention is fixed upon us. 

What a great scripture!  We have a God that not only overcame death but that now LIVES to intercede for us.  PRAISE GOD!

Day Thirty Seven of my Fourty Day Fast

Thirty seven days ago I embarked on a venture to fast like Jesus did.  Forty days of fasting and prayer was my quest.  Today, I have only have three days left and I'm feeling a little sad that it will end.  Never did I dream I would gain so much insight, depth of connection and love for my Savior.    

My prayers from the beginning have ranged from praying for personal depth and clarity for the mission ahead; to praying for people around me and even praying for the "unknown" ones that I will come in contact with through starting our ministry, "Restoration Road".    I have prayed for chains of bondage to be broken and a new direction in certain areas of my own life so I could lead others into the same freedom.  I have sought a closeness with Jesus and an emptying of my own desires so I can be a useful tool for His glory. 

Although this has been a difficult journey at times, the benefits are glorious in comparison.  Spiritually, God has been showing off to me.  In His Word, He says that "if you draw near to Him, He will reveal Himself to you."  This could not be more true in my life right now.  As I have discarded the outward things that cloud my pursuit of Him, and panted after Him as a deer pants for the water,  He has given me beautiful glimpses of  who He is.   One of my constant prayers along this journey has been, "Lord, I want to see you and know you.  I want to be closer to you."   The last week has been unbelievable as He has continued to show me insight after insight.  Each one makes me more thirsty and filled all at the same time.

Today, He showed me how our own creative power of reproduction makes us feel instantly connected to your new born child.   The minute the child is born and put into the arms of its parents there is this overwhelming love that overtakes the mother and father.  It's like nothing else, the love of a parent for its child.  That love is there because the parents have just taken a little bit of themselves and created another life.  It's part of them. 

God feels that same way about us.  He created us and feels connected to us.  We, in our ability to create life, get a small picture of what God feels about His own created beings.  His children, created for His purpose.  Loved by Him.  Fallen but not forgotten.  That's what we are.  Not forgotten but given a way of redemption because of the death of Jesus Christ.  

John 3:16 --" For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life."

That's the love of a personal God that wants us.  He used part of Himself to create us.  There is a connection that was broken and needs to be restored.  He made the way possible, now it's up to us.

RESTORATION ROAD BEGINS

It's time!!!  Starting September 7th our new ministry begins.  RESTORATION ROAD is a ministry focused on helping people find complete freedom from past hurts, addictions and other struggles in life.  Jesus had a plan from the beginning and that plan was for us to be restored to who He intended for us to be.  Our program is based on the premise that Jesus does the healing and we provide the tools to help Him. 

If you live in the Kansas City, MO area, you can find us at NEW LIFE COMMUNITY CHURCH, 10500 N. Central, Kansas City, MO 64155. 

Our hope is that as God works and changes lives we will have more opportunites to help others through adding other locations.  For more information, go to www.restorationroadkc.com.  God bless and watch for updates in the future! 

To the Unknown God

Good Morning world!  While reading my Bible this morning I read something that I felt compelled to share.

 In Acts 17 Paul is in Athens walking through the Areopagus.  For those of you that don't know what the Areopagus is, it was a temple built to house the many Gods that the Athenians worshiped.  In verse 23 Paul says "for as I was passing through and considering the objects of your worship, I even found an altar with this inscription: 'TO THE UNKNOWN GOD' "

Today, I walk through your temple.... the temple called of your life.   As I walk through your life, do I find many altars set up to different gods in your life?  Do I see altars to the god of children; the god of work; the god of achievement; the god of food; the god of self love and the god of religion?  Are there other altars that no one knows about but you?  Do I see an alter to "the unknown God?"

Paul went on to say this in verses 24-28 "Therefore, the One whom you worship with out knowing, Him I proclaim to you: God, who made the world and everything in it, since He is Lord of heaven and earth, does not dwell in temples made with hands.  Nor is He worshiped with men's hands as though He needed anything, since He gives to all life, breath, and all things.  And He has made from one blood every nation of men to dwell on all the face of the earth, and has determined their preappointed times and the boundaries of their dwellings, so that they should seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us; for in Him we live and move and have our being, as also some of you own poets have said 'For we are also His offspring.' "

Here is what I believe God wants us to understand about Paul's experience in Athens.  I believe God wants us to see Paul's experience and use it to apply to our life today.  What Paul saw in the Areopagus was many alters made for worship of different gods.  Then lastly, somewhat as a "catch-all" there was the alter to the "unknown God".  Just in case we forgot to worship something.... here's the "catch-all" god.   Paul's experience as he walked through that temple was probably difficult.  I bet his heart broke as he thought "You worship everything and everyone but the real God, the one you call "Unknown."

How ironic they would call Him "The Unknown God" because though they worshipped a carving to Him, He really was unknown to them.   As I walk through your life, is their an alter to "The Unknown God" ?

If so, let me introduce you to the One true God just like Paul did to those people in Athens.  Meet the God who knows everything about you because He made you.   He is all around you, in every part of the earth and makes everything breath.  As you walk on the ground outside your front door, you walk on His ground and His creation.  He is part of everything around and in you.  He appointed this time as the time you would live on the earth, in this part of the world, in this country, on this street.  Your life was appointed to you at this time in history with the hope that you would worship Him not as "Unknown" but as "Known", as your personal God, Savior and Lord.  For you are His offspring, created for more than just this small blip of time on the earth.

Make Him "Known" in your life by saying  "Jesus, I make my only altar to you." 

Been a long time since I have posted.... Needless to say, alot has happened. But let me get to the most important part. The last six months my time has been consumed with the preparation of a new ministry that is all about helping people overcome destructive behaviors and find complete freedom in Christ. The program is "Restoration Road" and will be starting in September this year at New Life Community Church in Kansas City, MO. I am so excited to see what God has planned! Stay tuned for more information in the coming days!!!!

What Is Your Most Valued Possession?

Lately I have been thinking about what we put our importance on. If I asked you to close your eyes and picture your most treasured material possession, what would you see in your minds eye? Would it be your wedding ring? Maybe it would be that new car now parked in your driveway? Maybe it's the photographs of family you spend hours placing into albums? Or could it be those skinny jeans that hug you in all the right places?

If the picture in your mind was anything other than the Bible, you might want to rethink your priorities. The Bible is the only material object you own that has any eternal value. It is the material possession you should value above all other possessions. All other material things you place value on here on this earth will pass away. When you leave this earth you can't take any of them with you. When you die the only material possession you can take with you is the Word of God.

No, you won't take the actual physical book to the grave and have in in your hand when you arrive in eternity. But if you place it as your highest value here on earth and wrap it around your heart, you will have it with you when you reach eternity. It will remake you into the image it carries. It will remake you into the image of Jesus Christ who is the Word. You see, the Bible is not just some ordinary book. It's the Word of God. It's living. It's breathing.

When read, it transforms you. When heard with an open heart, it penatrates and changes you. When spoken, the words don't fall flat or disapate once the vibration is gone. They linger in the air waiting to penatrate the soul. When they fall on the ears of man they can be used by the Holy Spirit to convict and change the heart.

The Trinity of God had a plan from the beginning. He had it written down by man in a book called the Bible. He placed His Word on paper so we could consume it not just place it on a shelf. The Word of God is to be absorbed and written on our heart. When we do that, we become what God intended from the beginning. We become transformed into the image of Jesus.

The only way to have the process of transformation take place is to give the Word of God is rightful place in our lives. It must become our most valued material possession.

The Silence is Broken

Have you ever been through a time in your life where you felt like God put the phone receiver down or pressed the mute button? You feel like God has forgotten you or left you in this big world all on your own. That's been the way I've felt for so long. I felt like I was dialing up God, the phone would pickup but there was only silence on the other end of the line.

At first I would beg and plead for God to talk to me. Then I would get mad and ignore Him. "If Your not going to talk to me, then I'm not talking to You either." Finally I resigned myself to the silence. I decided even if He was silent, I would continue to speak. So my prayers were one sided for a long time or at least they felt that way. The strong connection and inspired wisdom I once enjoyed was lacking and I didn't know why.

I am still not sure why God chose to keep His distance from me. I'm just glad that He has broken the silence and I can feel Him again. Maybe He wasn't ever gone and I was just required to believe in Him inspite of my feelings. I don't know, but I am glad to hear Him and feel Him again.

Once again, I have nights where I can't sleep and I must write down the words He puts in my head. What a blessing to hear the Word of God and have it pentrate clear down to my soul. I love His Words. They are a treasure to me. They breathe through me and I can exhale. It's as if I have been holding my breath waiting for Him so I can finally let the air out of my lungs. And as the air escapes the truth blows through me and changes me.

He is the air I breathe, the food I eat and the water I drink. He makes my world worth the living and puts the excitement into my day. Without Him, my joy is gone and I am anxious for His return. Waking up to a new day is different when He's the one brushing the sleep from your eyes. It's a day that has hope. A day with a purpose. It's a day where you feel loved. That... is worth everything even a little time of silence.

No More Words

I feel like my words have left me. There have been so many times in the last year I have sat with my laptop on my lap, my hands poised to type. I would type some heartfelt inspiration or a new revelation that God would graciously give me. But I have no inspiration. I have no great revelation from God. There is no closeness to God. I am void and it scares me.

Words have always been my way. They have helped me express emotion. At times they have praised loudly and shouted with joy. Other times my words have screamed out the pain when it couldn't be bottled up any longer. They have caressed my soul and soothed me when I've been weary. They have been cathartic and healing. They have always been my way to be touched by God and touch others.

But now, there seem to be no words for me. I am a woman with little to say. My voice is silent and it makes my heart sad. I would scream but I feel nothing would come out. My throat is dry and my heart feels the same. I miss my words, Lord.

I need a one woman revival, a renewing of my soul, as Bob Carlyle says in one of his songs. I need You, God. I need you to replace my heart of stone with softness and use me again. I need a filling that comes and bubbles over with more than I can contain on my own. Give me You. Cause I am empty and tired of the tank being filled with the wrong fuel. Time keeps ticking and I keep sitting. I can't just sit here empty anymore. I know they say You're not the one that leaves but it sure feels that way right now.

I am rejected, awkward, insecure and alone. When I'm with You all those things fade to the background. So I need a shot of You pulsing through my veins. I need a shot of God courage so I can stand with strength. I don't want to stand alone anymore. Fill me up with Your power and Your words. I'll leave my words behind if You give me Yours.

Give me Your heart. Give me Your ways. I don't want my ways anymore. I don't want my will. I want what You want for me and I'm willing to obey. Break me if necessary because I can't live without Your strong presence anymore. I need a river of living water flowing from my heart. The kind that comes from You and is dispensed by the Holy Spirit. Come Lord, come and breathe through me.

I'm Not Enough, But Jesus Is

I have come to believe their is a fundamental root issue to most mankind that causes each of us to act and become who we are. Most of us at the core just want to be loved, but believe we are not enough or cannot become good enough to have that happen for us. We strive to find our identity, who we are, so we can become someone worthy of the love we so desire.

I have spoken to and heard the stories of so many that fall prey to abuse at the hand of another because they feel unworthy and unloved. I too was fed on by those who seek their own way and was used to fulfill their need to have worth. All the time Satan smiles.... While we struggle to know who we are and hurt one another. His hope is we damage each other so badly there is no hope of healing.

As I have studied the Bible in the last few years, what I have come to understand is that we are supposed to be overcomers. Circumstances are not supposed to keep us from the beauty He has placed within each of us. As a believer in Jesus Christ, each of us has been given the Holy Spirit, a piece of the trinity. We have the living God within us and it is supposed to give us a new identity. It is supposed to give us the indentity we were born to have. We are overcomers. We are made in the image of God. We are heirs to the Kingdom of God. Made out of beauty and placed here to show something more than humanity can understand.

But Satan mauls the understanding and twists the mind so we don't see who we are and what we are capable of. I see people in horrible situations with no way out and no where to turn. Their place to turn is Jesus. They may not be able to change their circumstances but they can change the way their heart feels. Jesus is enough. Jesus can fulfill the longings inside even in the midst of the ugliest situations. Jesus can do what mankind cannot. He can give hope. He can give peace when the walls are shaking.

This I know so fully! Jesus has calmed my storms from the inside out. Sometimes the walls still vibrate around me and feel as if they will fall but I know who I am and it's enough. My sufficiency is in the one who made me and my identity is secure. I am who He says I am and that gives me the ability to feel secure in all circumstances.

The truth of who I am is no longer about the things and people around me. Those things will pass away but who I am in Jesus Christ stands for eternity. I see myself through the eyes of God and it gives me the peace and strength to do all things.

I am loved by the one who "is love" that makes me worthy of greatness. His greatness. Thats enough.

Twenty Three Minutes In Hell

Last week I picked up the book "Twenty Three Minutes in Hell" and read it in two days. Since reading it, I cannot stop thinking about those around me without hope of eternity. I posted the video below of the man who wrote the book speaking about his experience. He was taken to hell and describes the events. Watch the video, it will impact you to reach out to those around you.