Last week I posted about marriage being difficult. Thank you everyone for your comments and advice.

I do want to clarify. My marriage is not in jeopardy. Although we have our struggles, my marriage is solidly in the hands of Jesus. We made a covenant five years ago that we both intend to keep.

We do experience times that are tough in a married couple’s life. Finding the way to put ourselves aside and give instead of get is not always easy. This is especially difficult in a second marriage. The failings that happened the first time around have a way of creeping in the second one.

Seems that the second time around you have even more strikes against you from the start. You each bring extra things to overcome. Failures from the past, children, etc. In our case there were four children on his side and two on mine. When the children came before the marriage, it can be very easy to feel more loyalty to them. What you really have to work at is putting each other before the children.

My husband and I are strongly rooted in Jesus Christ. In each of our lives Jesus is first. Then we come together with Jesus at the head of our relationship. The problem comes in when we forget to put one another’s needs before our own. When we become selfish we both lose. I don't get my needs met and neither does he.

I believe this is a common failing in all of us. Not just in our marriage relationships but in all our relationships. It's called self. "I want my way." It's a prideful heart that says this. It's at the center of all of us. We are concerned with ourselves before anyone or anything.

So this week, I’m asking God to help me put my selfish "self" aside and meet my husband’s needs before my own. Change me Lord. Take the pride from my heart and help me to love others with Your love.

Amen