Hello all my bloggy friends.
Sorry it has been so long since I have posted. My computer has been acting up lately, making it hard to connect to the internet. Hopefully all will be back to continous connection next week.
Recently, I have been spending time just trying to figure out where God wants me to go next. What to do? what to do? Then as I spent some time just listening in prayer instead of talking, low and behold, I began to get some answers. Amazing how we get answers when we are prepared to hear them.
Anyway, I realized that to "do" is not what God wants from me, but to "be" is what He requires. I am to be like Him, follow Him. I am so prone to do, do, do.
I began to ask God why. Why am I so driven to do more? Why do I believe that I must do more to become acceptable in His eyes? Why is who I am not enough?
I know, I know, I can not work my way to heaven. It is not by works but by grace that we are acceptable in Gods sight but why can't I live that? Why must I continue to try and be good enough? Why is it, that no matter what I do, I never feel it is enough?
The message plays continually through my mind. "Your not enough" "What you have done is not enough, do more"
After finally listening, instead of talking, the spirit showed me this.
The messages that play for me in my mind are old messages. They are messages long overdue for a makeover. They came from my childhood where nothing you did was ever enough. I believed that if I just did one more thing requested of me by my Mother, maybe she would finally give me what I needed so desperately. Maybe she would finally love me. So day after day, year after year, I did more, tried harder, strived to be better. Only in the end, it was never enough.
The belief in my mind was that nothing was ever enough and you would always have to work to be loved. But that is not true and the message playing in my head is nothing but a lie.
There in no more condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus. I am enough, I do not have to do more. His grace is suffiecient. It was enough to save me. It is enough to continue to keep His love. There is nothing that can seperate me from His love and I do not have to work for it.
It is mine when I am good and even when I am bad. It is mine when I achieve and even when I fail. It is mine not because I could ever be good enough or ever do enough. His love is mine because I am His child. Thats it, thats all. I am His and He is mine. I am enough because He makes me enough.
2 weeks ago
1 comment:
This is wonderful. We are on the same page. I think it is human nature to want to work for our salvation. God is teaching me to walk away from my failures and sin with a clear conscience.... straight away. "But it can't be that easy", I protest, "surely a week of feeling miserable" I say. But no, Jesus paid for it all. All. That leaves me loved accepted and free. I cannot do one little bit to get forgiven :) Blessings.
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